Gardening in High Heels

cultivate a beautiful life

When Things Get Messy

When I was in college (and even high school) and I was struggling through a math problem I couldn’t solve, I would get so upset.  I would crumple up my paper, cross things out really hard so the paper tore, throw my pencil, and generally melt down.

And once I did that, I felt better.  I was able to refocus and 9/10 times, I would figure out the problem.  I’m not the best at math, but that’s a pretty good track record.

I’m really not a person who cries at the drop of a hat.  Usually I can keep things in check until it’s more appropriate.  Like Kelly Cutrone says, “If you have to cry, go outside.”

But like when I was trying to work through a hard math problem, I still have some moments when the stress and frustration gets too much and I want to sit down, get a carton big bowl of ice cream and just pout/whine (I originally wrote “wine,” which is totally acceptable, too).

Again, I get up and feel better and move on with clear eyes.

When this happens to me, I like to turn toward certain ladies who are so motivational and inspiring.

Inspiring resources for when life gets messy.

Molly Mahar‘s Stratejoy is fantastic.  I signed up for The Joy Equation course and I know I will love it based on the past Holiday Councils that I’ve attended with her.

There’s something about the way that she speaks to me that just touches something that both calms and energizes me.  And her Instagram is insanely beautiful/adorable/unapologetically, “Hey this is life,” which I love.

Along the same lines is Nicole Antoinette from A Life Less Bullshit.  Her energy is totally different than Molly’s, but she’s still a huge proponent of accepting that things get messy, not showing a Pinterest-perfect facade, and saying, “Listen, life gets sucky, get up, show up, and do the work.”

And her No BS Lab is fantastic.  It’s where I got all of the podcasts I listened to going to Virginia (that you can read about here and here).And finally, I love Marie Forleo‘s coaching.  She’s more business focused than life focused, but there are still gems that are applicable to everyday life.  Her personality is like sitting down with that friend who will tell you, “Get over yourself and do the work or stop whining about it.”

Of course, there are friends who will listen and commiserate.  I love those people in my life.  But I can’t share them with you (well, I can tell you about them, but I can’t say, “Here’s my best friend’s number, call her if you need someone to make you laugh.”)  These ladies..these I can share with you.  They’re great people to follow.

Who gives you inspiration when you need a reality check?

Favorite Quote, Part Two

Today’s post is going to be nice and short to make up for yesterday’s sprawling post.  To be a good quote, I think it has to be short, simple, impactful, and incredibly direct..everything this sentence is not.  To be a favorite quote, it has to carry power and meaning to the reader / person whose quote is their favorite.

Last month, I really wanted to share Baron Batch‘s line, “Be aware when your time is up,” because it was perfect for the day I shared it.  While I absolutely love that saying, another quote that I always come back to this one by Abraham Lincoln:

Whatever you are, be a good one. - Abraham Lincoln

Whatever you are, be a good one.

I always liked that saying from Abraham Lincoln.  Whatever you want to be, just make sure you’re really damn good at it.

It’s like what I heard Jenny Blake say during my Nicole Antoinette No BS Lab podcast binge.  She wrote a post about having a life purpose.  She says if you need a life purpose, take this one: Be as helpful as you can to as many people as you can.

Jenny is just about echoing Lincoln here.  Whatever you choose to do with your day, make sure it’s done to the best of your abilities.  However you choose to make yourself useful, be really useful.

Spread this around as far as you can, so long as it’s still doing good for someone else.

Just don’t spread it too thin.  If it’s too thin, it doesn’t do anyone any favors.  And when you get to the point where you’re sacrificing your doing good in the name of profitability, that’s when you need to turn back around and remember where you started.  That’s a very Dale Partridge thing to say, but I’ll get there later.

What are you doing today to be a good one?

Be a Better Blogger is a weekly link up dedicated to helping you be a more intentional blogger. Want to be a better blogger but don’t know where to start? Head over to the Be a Better Blogger page for daily prompts and a weekly linkup to help get the creative juices flowing! Oh, and use #beabetterblogger on Twitter/Instagram/Facebook to keep the fun going even after you hit Publish!

Be aware

Happy Memorial Day!  It’s a perfect day to relax, spend the day with people you care about, and remember those who were brave enough to dedicate their life mission to protecting us.  So it’s the perfect day to talk about favorite quotes for today’s Blogger, May I theme.  There are so many good quotations, I had a hard time picking one and actually wrote an entire other post before this one.

To be a good quotation, I think it has to be short, simple, impactful, and incredibly direct..everything this sentence is not.  There are two quotes that usually ping around in my brain.  One by Abraham Lincoln, and this one from Baron Batch.

Be aware when your time is up.

As I’ve written before, I attended the 2014 TEDx talks back when it was TEDxGrandviewAve (now it’s moved up to TEDxPittsburgh, woohoo!) and heard some great speakers.  Of course, I was there for  Britt Reints, but I was captivated by Baron Batch.

I didn’t know much about Baron before the talk.  I saw on the bio page that he was a former Pittsburgh Steeler and gave that all up to paint.  I was ready for some, “Follow your dream, don’t let things get in your way” kind of speech.

But no!  It was much more, “Hunt your dreams down, work harder and faster than you ever have, hustle, and strong-arm things out of your way.”  I was ready to run through a wall after I heard him speak.

I’ll watch the recorded talk today and still want to run through a wall.  Seriously, watch it.

When I went to the Creative Soul Weeknight Retreat, we made boxes with paper or paint or stamps or little plastic dinos or fibers…whatever our little hearts desired.  In mine (which I’ll take a photo of and share later..oops forgot!) I have Baron Batch’s quote written out.

Be aware when your time is up - Baron Batch

Be aware that you only have a little time here on the planet, so make it count.  Be aware that there’s always a ticking clock getting closer to the end, so make something worthwhile now.  Don’t squander the precious seconds you have – in a relationship, a day at the part with your kids, when you sit down to write.  Be acutely aware that time is pulling you away.

I could go on forever, baby.  (Bonus points if you know where that is from.)

Britt took that energy of the Creative Soul Weeknight Retreat and unleashed it on a whole weekend.  I’m so excited for the Creative Soul Retreat this fall for more time to reflect and create and play with new things.

A weekend of nothing but this laser-focused creative energy sounds absolutely fantasticly like where I need to be.  And seriously, it’s at a gorgeous hotel in downtown Pittsburgh with other creative souls.  Who’s with me here?

So what’s your favorite quote?

The one that makes you want to run through a wall and get shit done.  Or the one that calms you after you’ve run through a wall and need to refocus?



I was not asked to gush about the Creative Soul Retreat in this post, but it seemed like the perfect time to share it. If you’re in Pittsburgh or can make it here, I’d love to see you there. And early bird pricing ends June 1!

Defining beauty

There are some deep thoughts today for Blogger, May I. The topic: How do you define beauty?

Damn that is quite a question. For a long time, I wouldn’t have been able to honestly answer that I think that there is beauty in me. I always felt like there was something “messed up” – how I was raised, what I thought of myself. Stupid teenage stuff, y’know?

Beauty can't be taught; it's a state of being.

I think beauty goes further than the surface. You can be conventionally attractive on the outside, but if the insides are mean-spirited, unkind, or downright ugly, there’s a loss of beauty for sure.

I guess defining beauty for me is more of a mindset that an outward physical characteristic. When you own how you are, and you’re not being afraid to take risks and learn from them, there is beauty. Experiment, have confidence.

It’s a short answer, but sometimes you don’t need many words.

How do you define beauty?


How to: use manifesting and affirmations

Today’s Blogger, May I prompt is what are you learning?  It’s the perfect time to share this post.  I love Britt Reints, Emily Levenson, all the other women in the Propelle community who are believers in manifesting their dreams through intentions and affirmations.

I am a little skeptical.

Manifesting is an interesting idea that's getting a lot of attention in empowerment groups. Here are a few resources to learn about manifesting your dreams.

I am learning about it, though, and it’s fascinating.  My mom is a big believer in listening to your intuition; I am getting there, but I’m still having a hard time recognizing what I’m consciously thinking and what I’m hearing “the universe” say to me.  That said, I usually am pretty good at following my gut [insert joke about needing to tone my abs here].

A little over a year ago, I did Emily’s Project Miracles and had a great experience.  Based on Melody Beattie’s book, you write down your goals and what you want to and in 4o days, poof, it should be there.

It did take some time to get into the groove; I had a hard time trying to figure out where it was all going.  It was about a year after I did it that I finally saw some of the miracles I wanted to manifest take place.  I’m so impatient that I expect to work out once and see results, so manifesting and positive affirmations are as much an exercise in patience as they are in faith for me.

If you’re into manifesting and using affirmations, here are a few things that I’ve found to be helpful.

One is setting the intention.  I received an email from the Propelle ladies that had this specific intention: I am open to receive.

That’s perfect.  How can you manifest anything if you aren’t open to the experience?  If you aren’t sure if you’re listening to your gut, tell yourself that you’re open to receive and just wait to see what vibe you get.

Second, believe what you’re manifesting is possible.  In another Propelle email, they wrote this:

Manifestation is not only about envisioning what you want to happen happening but it’s also believing it’s possible and that you’re capable and worthy.

There’s also a fun letter to the universe you can use.

Three: get specific.  That’s another theme throughout my research that I’ve noticed.  Propelle recommends getting very specific.  Marie Forleo talks about it in conjunction with a gratitude practice.  My mom would always tell me that, too.  Tell the universe very clearly what you want.

How’s this for specific: tapping for $50,000.

Lastly, meditation.  It helps to have a clear headspace when you are manifesting.  I love this practical guide from A Daring Adventure.  Britt Reints also has many helpful affirmations if you sign up for her newsletter!

Everyone says to “sit with it.”  This is something I hear all the time, most recently from a Google Hangout that Emily Cassel hosted.

I’ve come to learn that I need help just marinating in things.  I definitely trust in feeling out a gut reaction, but sometimes I have a hard time knowing what the universe is saying to me and what am I consciously thinking.

If you’re looking for more information about manifesting, here’s a seven-step process from Kate Northrup.  And I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Gretchen Rubin, too!

What are you learning?  Would you ever try manifesting?


Need the prompts for the Blogger, May I challenge? Gotcha covered. Want to use your own prompts? No problem! Just grab a button to show that you’re linking up with myself, Katy, and Meghan. Oh, and use #BloggerMayI on Twitter/Instagram to keep the fun going even after you hit Publish!

Let’s Play

           

People Really Dug These

We Belong in the Garden Together